Midwest TMS'ers General Communication Thread
#5282
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Join Date: October 10, 2004
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My neighbor told me a tacky Obama joke yesterday -
ok, ok, here it is...
Obama arrives at the Pearly Gates and is greeted by St. Peter. As is standard with all new arrivals, St. Peter asks him to state his name and occupation, to which Obama proudly declares, "I am Barack Obama, and I am President of the United States."
St. Peter raises a brow and peers over the top of his log book. "Really? President? I must have fallen asleep - when did this happen?
Obama says, "Oh, about 10 minutes ago..."
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Obama arrives at the Pearly Gates and is greeted by St. Peter. As is standard with all new arrivals, St. Peter asks him to state his name and occupation, to which Obama proudly declares, "I am Barack Obama, and I am President of the United States."
St. Peter raises a brow and peers over the top of his log book. "Really? President? I must have fallen asleep - when did this happen?
Obama says, "Oh, about 10 minutes ago..."
#5283
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Thread Starter
My neighbor told me a tacky Obama joke yesterday -
ok, ok, here it is...
Obama arrives at the Pearly Gates and is greeted by St. Peter. As is standard with all new arrivals, St. Peter asks him to state his name and occupation, to which Obama proudly declares, "I am Barack Obama, and I am President of the United States."
St. Peter raises a brow and peers over the top of his log book. "Really? President? I must have fallen asleep - when did this happen?
Obama says, "Oh, about 10 minutes ago..."
![Stickpoke](https://themustangsource.com/forums/images/smilies/stickpoke.gif)
Obama arrives at the Pearly Gates and is greeted by St. Peter. As is standard with all new arrivals, St. Peter asks him to state his name and occupation, to which Obama proudly declares, "I am Barack Obama, and I am President of the United States."
St. Peter raises a brow and peers over the top of his log book. "Really? President? I must have fallen asleep - when did this happen?
Obama says, "Oh, about 10 minutes ago..."
Unfortunately, that is not too hard to imagine. But I don't think he'll win the election- there are too many people that won't vote for a black man. I heard last night that McCain is now ahead in the polls by like 5 points.
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#5288
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#5290
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I talked to a prosecuter, and she (very nice young lady) asked me what happened...
The REAL Story:
My wife had just gotten some cavities filled at the dentist and half of her face was numb and non-functional, Everytime she smiled, it looked HILARIOUS!! So we were driving home and I was doing things to make her smile.....one of those things happed to be cutting inside of the third to last orange barrell while merging back to our correct lane while exiting a contrction zone. The cop was about a half mile ahead of me and must have saw me in his mirrior. Busted!
My Defense in Court.
First off....Police officer wasnt there. So I told her that I was switching lanes exiting a construction zone to let peope tailgaiting me pass by. The Officer must have just caught a glimpse of my lane movement and thought it was too fast. I did not opperate unsafely to my knowledge.
Hottie prosecuter: "did you cause and accident?"
Me: "No."
Hottie: "Did it cause anyone to have to swerve or avoid you"
Me: "No...I was trying to get out of their way"
Hottie: "Ok...I'm going to go ahead and dismiss this for you since it did not cause any trouble and you have no prior offenses"
Lesson Learned....No goofing off behind the wheel. I never do....but the first time I did I got nailed for it...so I guess it was a good experiance.
The REAL Story:
My wife had just gotten some cavities filled at the dentist and half of her face was numb and non-functional, Everytime she smiled, it looked HILARIOUS!! So we were driving home and I was doing things to make her smile.....one of those things happed to be cutting inside of the third to last orange barrell while merging back to our correct lane while exiting a contrction zone. The cop was about a half mile ahead of me and must have saw me in his mirrior. Busted!
My Defense in Court.
First off....Police officer wasnt there. So I told her that I was switching lanes exiting a construction zone to let peope tailgaiting me pass by. The Officer must have just caught a glimpse of my lane movement and thought it was too fast. I did not opperate unsafely to my knowledge.
Hottie prosecuter: "did you cause and accident?"
Me: "No."
Hottie: "Did it cause anyone to have to swerve or avoid you"
Me: "No...I was trying to get out of their way"
Hottie: "Ok...I'm going to go ahead and dismiss this for you since it did not cause any trouble and you have no prior offenses"
Lesson Learned....No goofing off behind the wheel. I never do....but the first time I did I got nailed for it...so I guess it was a good experiance.
#5295
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Haha, Ill be blazing thru Ohio next week on my way to Cleveland for Indians vs White Sox.
Any cruise nights in the Cleveland area? Sat-Tues? I see a quaker steak & lube restaurant 7 miles away id like to check out.
Quaker Steak and Lube
5935 Canal Rd.
Valley View, Ohio 44125
Any cruise nights in the Cleveland area? Sat-Tues? I see a quaker steak & lube restaurant 7 miles away id like to check out.
Quaker Steak and Lube
5935 Canal Rd.
Valley View, Ohio 44125
#5298
I talked to a prosecuter, and she (very nice young lady) asked me what happened...
The REAL Story:
My wife had just gotten some cavities filled at the dentist and half of her face was numb and non-functional, Everytime she smiled, it looked HILARIOUS!! So we were driving home and I was doing things to make her smile.....one of those things happed to be cutting inside of the third to last orange barrell while merging back to our correct lane while exiting a contrction zone. The cop was about a half mile ahead of me and must have saw me in his mirrior. Busted!
My Defense in Court.
First off....Police officer wasnt there. So I told her that I was switching lanes exiting a construction zone to let peope tailgaiting me pass by. The Officer must have just caught a glimpse of my lane movement and thought it was too fast. I did not opperate unsafely to my knowledge.
Hottie prosecuter: "did you cause and accident?"
Me: "No."
Hottie: "Did it cause anyone to have to swerve or avoid you"
Me: "No...I was trying to get out of their way"
Hottie: "Ok...I'm going to go ahead and dismiss this for you since it did not cause any trouble and you have no prior offenses"
Lesson Learned....No goofing off behind the wheel. I never do....but the first time I did I got nailed for it...so I guess it was a good experiance.
The REAL Story:
My wife had just gotten some cavities filled at the dentist and half of her face was numb and non-functional, Everytime she smiled, it looked HILARIOUS!! So we were driving home and I was doing things to make her smile.....one of those things happed to be cutting inside of the third to last orange barrell while merging back to our correct lane while exiting a contrction zone. The cop was about a half mile ahead of me and must have saw me in his mirrior. Busted!
My Defense in Court.
First off....Police officer wasnt there. So I told her that I was switching lanes exiting a construction zone to let peope tailgaiting me pass by. The Officer must have just caught a glimpse of my lane movement and thought it was too fast. I did not opperate unsafely to my knowledge.
Hottie prosecuter: "did you cause and accident?"
Me: "No."
Hottie: "Did it cause anyone to have to swerve or avoid you"
Me: "No...I was trying to get out of their way"
Hottie: "Ok...I'm going to go ahead and dismiss this for you since it did not cause any trouble and you have no prior offenses"
Lesson Learned....No goofing off behind the wheel. I never do....but the first time I did I got nailed for it...so I guess it was a good experiance.
Man there must be something in the air around here. Coming out of work yesterday I ride down 2 small roads to get to the hi-way to get home. Both roads have tall corn on each side and are only about 1/2 mile long before I turn off them. as I'm coming up to one of the turns a County brownie comes around the turn flips on his lights and goes by me, does a u turn and comes up behind me. Now I'm just out of work and I never do anything crazy cuz the car itis not warmed up so I just cruisen. He ask for my paper work and says you were doing 51 in a 40. I'm stopped right at my turn and I'm thinkin no way maybe 42 tops as the road from stop sign to the turn isn't over a 1/4 mile. He gave me a warning for speed, told me my licese expires next year on my birthday and to slow it down. I'm thinkin he came around the corner saw my car and just figure I had to going fast. Also in the middle of the stop a local New Carlise cop shows up and I hear him ask "How fast did you clock him at", when he hear the answer he sais "Is that all?" and laugh. 1st time I've been stopped in 25 years. But no Ticket.
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Last edited by dly; 8/22/08 at 04:58 AM.
#5299
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Haha, Ill be blazing thru Ohio next week on my way to Cleveland for Indians vs White Sox.
Any cruise nights in the Cleveland area? Sat-Tues? I see a quaker steak & lube restaurant 7 miles away id like to check out.
Quaker Steak and Lube
5935 Canal Rd.
Valley View, Ohio 44125
Any cruise nights in the Cleveland area? Sat-Tues? I see a quaker steak & lube restaurant 7 miles away id like to check out.
Quaker Steak and Lube
5935 Canal Rd.
Valley View, Ohio 44125
#5300
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Friday friday friday
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