..... A Mercury is a good car and that's what I was driving that day. I've owned a lot of cars. Different kinds. Lots of different kinds of cars. She was standing, this girl, on the side of the street where there was a chicken stand; not the Colonel, mind you, but nevertheless a chicken stand, and I pulled the Mercury over and rolled down the window by electric power. She was wearing a leather skirt and she had a lot of hair on her arms. I like that. I like it a lot. It means a big bush. I like a big bush. She said, "Are you dating?" I said, "yes," and she got in the car. We pulled to a remote location, one that she and I both felt comfortable with and she said, "How much can you spend?" I said, "What it takes to see your bush. I know it's a big one." She said "twenty five dollars," which to a working man is not chicken feed. I produced the money and she put it in her shoe and pulled up her skirt. There before me lay a thin, crooked, uncircumcised *****. You can imagine how badly I wanted my twenty-five dollars back.