[teenagedramarant]
i dunno. ive just had a really horrible week. heh, i could have my own show on VH1 or something...

my mom wont let me visit the coolest girl i ever met cuz she's in another state. how cool? shoot, i think about her more than i think about modding my car. when parts show up on my doorstep, its now "oh cool" instead of "YES!!!". i thought about it. and i see why (i cant go visit... at least right now. i will get to see her again before college...i hope), but now she wants me to cut off all communication with all my friends i made in my travels this summer. my cell fone is "for emergencies only" and i can "only call family members" even though i used 0 minutes talking with my friends as we are all part of the INetwork from Verizon. in the words of me dear mother "i dont care who the heck (lang. filter in effect right there) Laina is. i dont care about you staying in contact with some girl you barely know" barely know? geez, she's quite possibly the only girl in the world who accepts me for the person i am and doesnt give a rats tushie about anything other than my personality (well... that and the hair )

i have ONE bad grade. and it only works out to be that bad grade b/c its early on. im missing half of my assignments in math. all two of em. i tired explaining that TWO 10 pt assignments dont mean anything. especially b/c HW is only 20% of the full grade anyhoo, and it only somes out looking bad b/c theres been so few assignments anyways.

i cant go to the basball game today that i've been waiting two months for. it was gonna be a bit of a reunion of me and my friends that have been out of touch for awhile. my friend nearly lost $100 for my ticket (darn nice seats...) luckilly he found someone else to take my spot.

i cant go to one of my best friends Bday parties tomro night. same reason

and plus, my parents give me ZERO trust. they think my friends are all a bunch of bums who screw around 24/7, when in reality, i view these people as better human beings than myself.

and now im having "delusional ideas" and "pipe dreams" about my art. as of recent, a few people, my art teacher at school included and even my current boss, tell me i could go into this as a career. i never really thought of my art like that b4. and i just mention that to them, and they think im hopeless. i will "never go anywhere with my art" i thought parents were supposed to support me and offer giudance? :scratch: not impose rules that prevent me from being a human being.

also, the internet doesnt exist in my room anymore. ehternet cord? <pluck>

thankfully i finally got that blessed wireless thing to work.

you hear that my dear laptop? you are forgiven.

also, im banned from TMS by them b/c cars and art will take me nowhere in life and turn me into an uncultured brute who cant get into college or make anything of himself.

im sorry if im boring you all to death with my crazy teenage drama, but i just need to vent my frustration. all i really have anymore is the few minutes on tMS when the wireless thing works and my music and whatever calls i can get in to my farawya friends after school. shoot, these days i enjoy being in school more than i do being at home.

all i want is a satisfactory job, that gives me what i need and that i enjoy doing. i want to enjoy life by speinding time with the ppl i care about.

i know my parents mean well. they want me to have a good life. but they dont understand that i dont have to fill their dreams for me to be happy. i dont want a high end uber job. i dont want hundreds of thousands of dollars a year.

all i can really say now, is thanks to all of you for listening and for the support i get from ppl here. this place is a huge escape for me.


[/rant]

 

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