The Coolest Car in America
12/16/10, 12:06 PM
#1
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The Coolest Car in America
I hereby anoint and announce the coolest car in America:
The Cadillac CTS-V ... Wagon!
Yes, my flabbergasted brethren, a s-t-a-t-i-o-n-w-a-g-o-n. Perhaps it was so many hours in my formative years riding in big Ford Country Squire wagons, with their big-block motors rumbling away the miles, that I have a special affection for the Power Wagon.
While most unthinkingly and reflexively write off wagons as a variant of the mommy mobile worse than the mini van, I counter that they are, in fact, a brilliant amalgam of performance and practicality. You're not just getting your cake and eating it too, you're getting the whole **** bakery shop.
Performance? How about a great 556hp bolide of a motor backed up by a genuine stir-your-own-gears six-speed manual transmission with a genuine clutch pedal operating a genuine clutch. End results? While you might not see the back end of one in your new 5.0, you probably only need to glance out your side window to get a good view of a grinning CTS-V wagon driver, plus family, plus dog, plus a weeks groceries. A 12.5 second quarter mile at 114.4 mph will make sure to get the milk home all fresh and ready for your corn flakes.
Practicality? Forget how many cases of beer you can stick in the thing, how many kegs will this beast haul? Heading to Vegas with the Bros? Load them boys up, liquor, luggage, blow up dolls and all and head to Sin City at about 145mph. Wife gripping about your Stang not being able to cart about the brood? Strap the triplets into this thing, strollers and fresh diapers in back, and paint some black stripes down your block on the way to the Tiger Tots day care center to relieve yourself of your squalling little darlings.
Added benefits?
Stealth. Get this thing in some innocuous color and you'll drop off Johny Law's radar like an F-22. If you need to haul some dead bodies to the back woods, but quick, this is your ride.
Insurance? Not sure but if the Good Hands people see this as just another dray mommy mobile, you probably need to do little more than check under your sofa cushions to scratch together your premium dues.
Space. Any more space in this thing and you'd have your own personal parallel universe. You don't just take this to a National Park, you ARE the National Park.
Case closed. My arguments are unassailable. This is the coolest car in America.
The Cadillac CTS-V ... Wagon!
Yes, my flabbergasted brethren, a s-t-a-t-i-o-n-w-a-g-o-n. Perhaps it was so many hours in my formative years riding in big Ford Country Squire wagons, with their big-block motors rumbling away the miles, that I have a special affection for the Power Wagon.
While most unthinkingly and reflexively write off wagons as a variant of the mommy mobile worse than the mini van, I counter that they are, in fact, a brilliant amalgam of performance and practicality. You're not just getting your cake and eating it too, you're getting the whole **** bakery shop.
Performance? How about a great 556hp bolide of a motor backed up by a genuine stir-your-own-gears six-speed manual transmission with a genuine clutch pedal operating a genuine clutch. End results? While you might not see the back end of one in your new 5.0, you probably only need to glance out your side window to get a good view of a grinning CTS-V wagon driver, plus family, plus dog, plus a weeks groceries. A 12.5 second quarter mile at 114.4 mph will make sure to get the milk home all fresh and ready for your corn flakes.
Practicality? Forget how many cases of beer you can stick in the thing, how many kegs will this beast haul? Heading to Vegas with the Bros? Load them boys up, liquor, luggage, blow up dolls and all and head to Sin City at about 145mph. Wife gripping about your Stang not being able to cart about the brood? Strap the triplets into this thing, strollers and fresh diapers in back, and paint some black stripes down your block on the way to the Tiger Tots day care center to relieve yourself of your squalling little darlings.
Added benefits?
Stealth. Get this thing in some innocuous color and you'll drop off Johny Law's radar like an F-22. If you need to haul some dead bodies to the back woods, but quick, this is your ride.
Insurance? Not sure but if the Good Hands people see this as just another dray mommy mobile, you probably need to do little more than check under your sofa cushions to scratch together your premium dues.
Space. Any more space in this thing and you'd have your own personal parallel universe. You don't just take this to a National Park, you ARE the National Park.
Case closed. My arguments are unassailable. This is the coolest car in America.
12/16/10, 12:30 PM
#4
Bow Chica Bow Wow
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If they change the styling I'd love it..but i hate the way Cadillacs look and that is a huge part of "cool" for me.
Unfortunately Rhumb this doesn't tick my cool meter...especially if it's "coolest car in america" that is a **** broad catagory that should include everything from old hotrod right up to your caddy.
If you are talking wagons..then give me a Nomad any day over this. Or maybe that drive train in a 56-57 nomad? I'd be all over that.
Unfortunately Rhumb this doesn't tick my cool meter...especially if it's "coolest car in america" that is a **** broad catagory that should include everything from old hotrod right up to your caddy.
If you are talking wagons..then give me a Nomad any day over this. Or maybe that drive train in a 56-57 nomad? I'd be all over that.
Last edited by burningman; 12/16/10 at 12:33 PM.
12/16/10, 12:35 PM
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Only the slightest bit of hyperbole in my post 
but a pretty darned cool car nonetheless.
I do wish Pontiac, God rest its soul, had brought over a GXP version of the G8 wagon that perhaps us poor working slobs could aspire to. Alas, perhaps Chevy will see that light and bring over a version(s) of this great platform.
Or Dodge still made the Magnum SRT-8 (or pick up a cherry used one...).
but a pretty darned cool car nonetheless.I do wish Pontiac, God rest its soul, had brought over a GXP version of the G8 wagon that perhaps us poor working slobs could aspire to. Alas, perhaps Chevy will see that light and bring over a version(s) of this great platform.
Or Dodge still made the Magnum SRT-8 (or pick up a cherry used one...).
Last edited by rhumb; 12/16/10 at 12:37 PM.
12/16/10, 12:39 PM
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I hereby anoint and announce the coolest car in America:
The Cadillac CTS-V ... Wagon!
Yes, my flabbergasted brethren, a s-t-a-t-i-o-n-w-a-g-o-n. Perhaps it was so many hours in my formative years riding in big Ford Country Squire wagons, with their big-block motors rumbling away the miles, that I have a special affection for the Power Wagon.
The Cadillac CTS-V ... Wagon!
Yes, my flabbergasted brethren, a s-t-a-t-i-o-n-w-a-g-o-n. Perhaps it was so many hours in my formative years riding in big Ford Country Squire wagons, with their big-block motors rumbling away the miles, that I have a special affection for the Power Wagon.
(Mine was a Pontiac wagon family. Man - the stuff we hauled and the trips we took... with that big 455!)
12/16/10, 12:43 PM
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...mom, dad, 3 kids, 2 Irish Wolfhounds, a family-sized tent and two weeks worth of camping gear all while trailing an 18 foot motorboat 8 hours up to Cayuga Lake for summer vacation ... what great cars!
12/16/10, 03:36 PM
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Perhaps, but if I rode around in this, would thus I reject all coupes?
12/16/10, 07:05 PM
#11
Tasca Super Boss 429 Member
Interesting
Would I own one?
Sure.
It looks like crap, but I don't care if it goes real fast.
I'll just wait until I can get a used one for under $10K.
Then I won't feel bad about driving a crappy looking car.
By the way, I love the old GM wagons like the Vista Cruiser.
Sure.
It looks like crap, but I don't care if it goes real fast.
I'll just wait until I can get a used one for under $10K.
Then I won't feel bad about driving a crappy looking car.
By the way, I love the old GM wagons like the Vista Cruiser.
12/16/10, 07:58 PM
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12/16/10, 08:35 PM
#14
If I absolutely had to drive a wagon, the Caddy would come in about 3rd. Audi RS6 Avant would be at the top of the list.
http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/...t_drive_review
.
http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/...t_drive_review
.
12/16/10, 09:13 PM
#17
If I absolutely had to drive a wagon, the Caddy would come in about 3rd. Audi RS6 Avant would be at the top of the list.
http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/...t_drive_review
.
http://www.caranddriver.com/reviews/...t_drive_review
.
The best looking wagons from the 80's were made in Hollywood!
12/17/10, 05:05 AM
#19
I dig the older 4-Eyed 740 Turbo Wagons . . . .
'80s LTD and Fairmont Wagons aren't too bad either . . . when massaged a bit . .
Last edited by Evil_Capri; 12/17/10 at 05:06 AM.
