JUST RANDOM THOUGHTS, PICTURES & MEME'S!
Legacy TMS Member
Joined: August 7, 2006
Posts: 16,113
Likes: 789
From: In Boredom
- Why doesn't anyone play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
- Why can't you trust stairs? They're always up to something.
- What kind of sandals do frogs prefer? Open toad.
- How do birds learn how to fly? They wing it.
Thread Starter
Administrator clevparts@aol.com
Joined: November 27, 2004
Posts: 12,563
Likes: 4,312
From: Visalia Ca.
- What did the horse say after it tripped?
2. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the “P” is silent.
3. What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
4. What do you call an angry carrot?
A steamed veggie.
5. Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snowbank.
6. How do you make an egg-roll?
You push it!
7. What would bears be without bees?
Ears.
8. What do you call a pile of cats?
A meow-ntain.
9. Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
10. Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was two tired.
11. What did the triangle say to the circle?
You’re pointless.
12. RIP, boiling water.
You will be mist.
13. Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.
14. I ordered a chicken and an egg online.
I’ll let you know what comes first.
15. Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer?
She kept running away from the ball!
16. What do lawyers wear to court?
Lawsuits.
17. What do elves learn in school?
The elf-abet.
18. Where was King David’s temple located?
Beside his ear.
19. What did one toilet say to another?
You look flushed.
20. What lights up a soccer stadium?
A soccer match.
21. What does corn say when it gets a compliment?
Aw, shucks!
22. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
Attire.
23. What’s red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
24. What do sprinters eat before they race?
Nothing. They fast.
25. What has more lives than a cat?
A frog, because it croaks every day.
26. Why was the fish’s grades bad?
They were below sea level.
27. What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
1forrest1.
28. What do you call a fish without an eye?
Fsh.
29. Why shouldn't you use a broken pencil?
Because it's pointless.
30. What do you call a pig that practices karate?
A pork chop.
Last edited by 05stangkc; Dec 18, 2023 at 02:08 PM.
Legacy TMS Member
Joined: August 7, 2006
Posts: 16,113
Likes: 789
From: In Boredom
1. What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars?
Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
2. I stopped to pick up a hitchhiker.
Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving.
3. My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far.
Now, it’s even affecting my driving. She took the carb-orator off my car!
4. Husband: “Honey, the neighbor is washing the car with his son again!”
Wife: “Poor kid! Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.”
Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
2. I stopped to pick up a hitchhiker.
Turns out he was just telling me he approved of my driving.
3. My sweetheart is always taking health food crazes too far.
Now, it’s even affecting my driving. She took the carb-orator off my car!
4. Husband: “Honey, the neighbor is washing the car with his son again!”
Wife: “Poor kid! Go over there and tell him to use a sponge instead.”
V6 Member
Joined: October 29, 2023
Posts: 95
Likes: 102
From: Pacific Northwest
