future9er24

... because he doesn't know what hes doing, read this and know that there are many worse things that can happen to an engine than me

Brian has a '69 Galaxie 500 with a 302

(4:17:08 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: question
(4:17:20 PM) Me: go
(4:17:30 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: so, i changed the plugs wires cap and rotor
(4:18:14 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: and the car doesnt start. when it should, it kinda jumps a little once, but then just goes right back to cranking. so im thinking its got something to do w/ the rotor
(4:18:27 PM) Me: uhh
(4:18:30 PM) Me: you probably raped the timing
(4:18:37 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: raped the timing?
(4:18:52 PM) Me: when you the cap is what i was rotating to set the timing
(4:18:55 PM) Me: whenever you replace that stuff
(4:18:59 PM) Me: the timing is shot to hell
(4:19:03 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: ah ok
(4:19:06 PM) Me: thus
(4:19:09 PM) Me: you raped the timing
(4:19:10 PM) Me: rapist
(4:19:12 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: haha
(4:19:14 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: alright alright
(4:19:21 PM) Me: that poor distributor
(4:19:21 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: at least im raping distributors and not women
(4:19:31 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: and not literally anyway
(4:19:33 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: ok ANYways
(4:19:34 PM) Me: "at least im raping..." is never a good counterargument
(4:19:43 PM) Me: fact
(4:19:45 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: so how do i fix this? just twist it a little?
(4:19:52 PM) Me: twist it til it sounds right
(4:19:58 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: it doesnt turn on though
(4:20:00 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: it just cranks
(4:20:14 PM) Me: are you sure all the plugs went to the correct spots on the distributor
(4:20:27 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: wait, they're assigned?
(4:20:32 PM) Me: oh dear....
(4:20:34 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: haha
(4:20:35 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: wow
(4:20:42 PM) Me: yes they are assigned by firing order
(4:20:45 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: you know i looked for something like that, like, directions
(4:20:56 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: but the boxes didnt say anything
(4:21:02 PM) Me: look up the firing order for any 302
(4:21:04 PM) Me: and its the same
(4:21:09 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: ok
(4:21:20 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: so i just look up the firing order?
(4:21:22 PM) Me: yes
(4:21:37 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: how can i tell the difference though?
(4:21:37 PM) Me: preferably find a picture of a 1969ish enging
(4:21:41 PM) Me: and just match the pictures
(4:21:46 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: ok
(4:22:02 PM) Me: you did worse than just rape the distributor
(4:22:06 PM) Me: you raped the whole engine
(4:22:08 PM) Me: repeatedly
(4:22:12 PM) Me:
(4:22:15 PM) Me: poor little V8
(4:22:28 PM) Me: so pure
(4:22:30 PM) Me: and joyous
(4:22:31 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: but itll still start up, right?
(4:22:36 PM) Me: once you fix it
(4:22:37 PM) Me: yes
(4:22:39 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: ok
(4:23:01 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: see you said you were gonna help me
(4:23:02 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: but you didnt
(4:23:04 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: so thanks
(4:23:07 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: you backstabber
(4:23:14 PM) Brian "Obi-Wan" Grabianowski: you arent even good enough to be an enemy
(4:23:21 PM) Me: lol
(4:23:23 PM) Me: oh well
(4:23:24 PM) Me: im happy
(4:23:28 PM) Me: i was working on the bike today

GottaHaveIt

I got some like 6,000 or so hot-wheels you can play doctor with.

2k7gtcs

Dude. That sucks. I can't believe someone would work on their car with that little knowledge. Whatever you do don't let him work on his own brakes.

karman

Thanks for a classic "newbie mechanic" story.

future9er24

Usually I do the work on his car (and... well... all my friend's cars except the M coupe), but I didn't want to go to his house when I could just go outside and work on my bike

Sigh... To think I just had the engine singing and idling at 550rpm, smooth as butter. lol

2k7gtcs

I thought you were parting out the bike. Is that still true?

GottaHaveIt

dang Gary if you don't have more posts than Arin ?

StangMahn

wow, that sucks! Go over and help him fix it!

future9er24

haha, I sent him a picture of a 302 with the firing order. He should learn.

Besides, I was working on the bike more later on, and hung out with the BMW Peter and Lisa Funbags

cntchds

I doubt he could F with the timing if he was just replacing the cap and rotor. Those are just replacing, at least with my EFI system. You don't have to really turn the distributor if you don't really try to.

future9er24

Keep in mind this is Brian, and he's working on a CAR

StangMahn

"lisa funbags" rofl

future9er24

This comic will explain. Lisa Fahey embodies the characteristics described rather well, so I now refer too her as Lisa Funbags. I my phone, I don't even bother putting "Lisa"

svopaul

"raped the timing" ?!?!? What in the hell kind of term is that? Not a mechanical one that's for sure...

Anyway, if you just replace wires, cap and rotor the timing does NOT change......

So you should still put the screwdriver down and back away from the car

future9er24

I know you shouldn't mess up the timing with a rotor/wire change, but this is Brian, so I had to assume the worst

svopaul

That still doesn't explain where your terminology came from

future9er24

Rape is the only word I could think of that accurately describes what Brian has put that car through

svopaul

OK, I'll let you slide this time.

429 Boss Mustang

by the way aint the firing order on motor lol unless he has alot of grease build up lol
on my 92 and 78 and 04 f 150 and 250s their listed lol

future9er24

Well he has the original motor from '69, so alot of the stickers might be covered in grease. It should be still there though, I mean the "corect idle speeds" are still on the sticker on the driver side valve cover lol