southern_stang_girlee

What the car you buy says about you:

- Acura Integra: I have always wanted to own the Buick of sports cars

- Acura Legend: I'm too bland for German cars

- Acura NSX: I am impotent

- Audi 90: I enjoy putting out engine fires

- Buick Park Avenue: I am older than 34 or the 50 states

- Cadiallac ElDorado: I am a very good Mary Kay salesman

- Cadiallac Seville: I am a pimp

- Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating the heck out of people

- Chevrolet Chevette: I like seeing people's reactions when I tell them it's a 'vette

- Chevrolet Corvette: I'm in a mid-life crisis

- Chevrolet El Camino: I am leading a militia to overthrow the government

- Chrysler Corboda: I dig rich Corinthian leather

- Datsun 280Z: I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

- Dodge Dart: I teach third grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

- Dodge Daytona: I delivered pizza for four years to get this car

- Eagle Talon (a.k.a.) 5.0L killer: I enjoy beating the crap out of sports car wannabees

- Ferrari Testarossa: I am known to prematurely ejaculate

- Ford Fairmont: (see dodge dart)

- Ford Mustang: I slow down to 85 in school zones

- Ford Probe: The name Ford Enema was rejected by marketing department, so they chose probe. The name says it all: Pain in the butt

- Ford Crown Victoria: I enjoy having people slow down to 55 and change lanes when I pull up behind them

- Geo Storm: I will start 11th grade in the fall

- Geo Tracker: I will start 12th grade in the fall

- Honda del Sol: I have always said half a convertible is better than no convertible at all

- Honda Civic: I have just graduated and have no credit

- Honda Accord: I lack any originality and am basically a lemming

- Honda Prelude: When i get my ***** enlarged, I will get a real sports car too

- Infiniti Q45: I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending

- Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a darn about J.D. Power or his reports

- Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich, I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year

- Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from the failure of Daihatsu

- Lamborghini Countach: I only have one ********

- Lincoln Town Car: I live for bingo and covered dish suppers

- Mercury Grand Marquis: (see above)

- Mercedes 500SL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

- Mercedes 500SEL: I have a daughter named Bitsy and a son named Cole

- Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler

- MGB: I am dating a mechanic

- Mitsubishi Diamante: I don't know what it means either

- Mitsubishi Eclipse: (see Eagle talon)

- Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings

- Oldsmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

- Peugot 505 diesel: I am on the EPA's ten most wanted list

- Plymouth Neon: I am emotionally unstable, but i am seeing a professional so I should be o.k., right??? right?? right?? answer me darn it!!!!

- Pontiac Trans AM: I have a switchblade in my sock

- Pontiac Sunfire: "BUILT FOR DRIVERS" who dont know jack poo about cars and mostly happen to be women fresh out of college who just wanna commute from A---B

- Porsche 911 turbo: I have a three inch thingie

- Porsche 944: I am dating a big haired woman that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

- Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: I think Pat Buchannon is a tad bit too liberal

- Saturn SC2: (see honda civic)

- Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu

- Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet

- Toyota Celica: Don't hate me because I am beautiful

-Toyota Echo: I weigh more than my car and the neighbor boy can beat me on his tricycle!

- Toyota Supra: Don't judge me because i am beautiful

- Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

- Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the closet

- Volkswagen Microbus: I am tripping right now

- Volkswagen Corrado: I also like the TV series "The pretender"

- Volvo (any type): I get beaten up by my wife

1999 Black 35th GT

Oh my God Lynell. Did you do those all yourself?!?! Holy Crap!!!! :worship: That is awesome!!!

How about the Toyota Echo: I weigh more than my car and the neighbor boy can beat me on his tricycle!

southern_stang_girlee

LOL ok, I edited it in... Good one, Andy!!

OH, and no, I can't take the credit for the list, I found it on the net!!

68notch

Yut yut.

1999 Black 35th GT

Its still awesome!!! though Lynell. We'll have think of some more to add. Like the Gremlin maybe...

GirchyGirchy

- 1985 Chevrolet Caprice Classic: I can't afford a new car yet.

future9er24

Cobra II-

II cool for the rest of you!

Autotooner

I posted this in off-topic sometime back... how 'bout Thunderbird- Best artist since the beginning of time as we know it...

Autotooner

<http://forums.bradbarnett.net/index.php?showtopic=24169>
here is the linky..

Fordracing200

Camaro-I am a retard who cant afford a real performance car

future9er24

uh.... no?

Fordracing200

Well, if they knew about real perf cars they would get a cobra

1999 Black 35th GT

I still like the one about the camry. The funniest thing is that there is a guy who lives down the hall from us and my wife and I think he may be um... you know...
Anyway she says she can detect that he is with her "gaydar"

Fordracing200

ha ha, my friend did a demo of his gaydar in lunch, i LMAO, their is a kid who we hate,named Mitchell, he mouths off, thinks he can take the world, so George said hey Mr. G wanna see my gaydar? wheres mitchel? LMAO! he pulled his thumb to start it up, vroom vrooooooooom , and it was funny

Fordracing200

Camaro- I wish my thingy was as big as my neighbors, he drives a 911 Turbo

southern_stang_girlee

Cars and the Stars: Your Astrological Road Report
By the Astrocenter Team


Did you know that the power of the planets zooms into every aspect of
your life, down to your car's horsepower? Beyond romance, career
choices, and money matters, the astrological forces play out in your
personal preferences in surprising ways - even down to the car you
decide to buy, and how you drive it!

Knowing the nature of your Sun Sign helps you to understand the basic
seat of your personality. Your Sun Sign represents who you are on a core
level, and offers clues to how you think about yourself, and how you
relate to the world around you. And yes, this includes your driving
habits and vehicle choices.

Check out the Sun Signs below for your astrological road report. Find
out how the stars inspire our taste in cars and why we drive the way we
do on the cosmic highway of life!





Aries:
(March 21 - April 19)
The racy Rams are the folks to be wary of on the road. Aries are
impatient drivers who don't like to sit at red lights. When they
approach an intersection and see the light turning yellow, they'll hit
the gas instead of the brake. They are in such a big hurry to get where
they're going, so it would not be the least surprising to find them
driving a fast, red sports car like a BMW or Porsche. For the more
outdoorsy types who need to charge off-road into the wilderness, it
seems natural that the perfect choice is the Dodge Ram, named after
their ruling archetype.


Taurus:
(April 20 - May 20)
Taureans are all about luxury and style. They want a posh, comfortable,
smooth ride. And, they want to be seen in a car they are proud of.
Taureans love comfort and aren't afraid to spring for heated leather
seats, automatic windows, and air conditioning. On the road, they are
safe, steady, and defensive drivers. Concerned about security, it isn't
surprising to learn that most car alarms are in cars with Taurus owners.
They want to protect their investment - especially since they are the
ones who have saved up for a new Mercedes Benz or Rolls Royce. While
they are saving, the Bull can't go wrong by riding in their namesake,
trusty vehicle, the Ford Taurus.


Gemini:
(May 21 - June 20)
If you see someone driving haphazardly while talking on his or her cell
phone, chances are good you've got your eyes on a Gemini driver. Geminis
love to multitask, and they also adore communicating. Being on the road
and talking on the phone simultaneously is like heaven for the Twin.
These are two great passions for these folks, and they aren't afraid to
put to the two together - even if it means driving around like a mad
person. Geminis are quick and often can't make up their mind. Be aware
of frequent lane changes from these folks. To support their need to whiz
around, look for them in a VW Jetta, or zippy Miata.


Cancer:
(June 21 - July 22)
Cancers don't like to leave home, but when they do, they feel more
secure and comfortable if their car resembles their home. Special
keepsakes and trinkets will line the dashboard of many Cancerian
vehicles. Their lucky rabbit's foot will dangle from the review mirror
and a picture of their kids will be tucked in the overhead sun visor.
Cancers like a vehicle they can virtually live in when they're on the
road. That is why the VW Vanagon fits them perfectly. An RV, Dodge
Caravan, or any large station wagon would also do quite nicely.


Leo:
(July 23 - August 22)
Leos are a proud bunch that likes to own the road. They need a large or
flashy vehicle that warns other drivers that they are in charge. When
merging onto a freeway, the Lion driver is not likely to yield with
complacency. They would prefer to have all other drivers yield to them -
regardless of who actually has the right of way. A large SUV or monster
truck with big tires suits these folks quite well, giving them a nice
high vantage point from which to rule the road. Let's not forget Leo's
association with big cats; the ultimate luxury car for them is a Jaguar.


Virgo:
(August 23 - September 22)
Virgos are practical and budget-oriented. They need a car that will get
them from A to B without any special bells and whistles. These folks are
champions of good car maintenance and will keep clear, detailed records
of oil changes, tire rotations, and fluid levels. They need a car that
is reliable, modest, and gets great gas mileage. Give them a Honda
Accord or Toyota Tercel and they'll be happy as clams. It's also natural
to see them driving a Ford Mercury, named after their ruling planet.


Libra:
(September 23 - October 22)
Do you ever wonder about the people who are doing their makeup or fixing
their hair while driving? Well, these are the Libras - the kings and
queens of fashion and beauty. Their rearview mirror is more often
pointed toward themselves instead of toward the back of the car. Who
needs to know what's going on behind you when the more pressing concern
is how you'll look when you arrive at your destination? Libras are into
style and luxury, and they aren't afraid to spend a little extra to get
the car that fits them perfectly - a Lincoln, Acura, or Audi.


Scorpio:
(October 23 - November 21)
Scorpios like to live on the edge. They are the extremists of the
zodiac, and they aren't afraid to drive in the same manner. Have you
ever been buzzed by a car going about 130 MPH on the freeway, going so
fast that you couldn't even make out the kind of car it was? Well, that
was your Scorpio buddy in their new Corvette or Ferrari. Perhaps he or
she was outrunning the police - or more likely - an ex-boyfriend or
girlfriend. These intense folks are also prone to love motorcycles and
like to be wild and free with their hair blowing in the wind.


Sagittarius:
(November 22 - December 21)
Ruled by Jupiter, the planet of long-distance travel, these folks are
born road warriors. Archers love to travel, explore new places and
people, and let the road lead the way. There's no need for a map when
you have a Sagittarian on board. Remember that Sag is half human and
half horse, so it's natural to see them in a Mustang, their trusty
steed. In addition, they'll delight in an adventuresome tour vehicle
that holds up well in the Great Outdoors like a Ford Explorer or Toyota
Land Cruiser.


Capricorn:
(December 22 - January 19)
Sea Goats are drivers with a plan. Before they leave the house, they
have their exact route carefully structured and mapped. They may have
even cross-referenced a couple Internet sources to get the most
efficient directions possible. Capricorns have half the trunk filled
with emergency gear like jumper cables, toolkits, extra maps, cases of
oil, windshield-washing fluid, and perhaps even a couple flares and a
GPS system. Look for them in a safe, practical vehicle like a Subaru,
Volvo, or Saturn (the car named after their steady ruling planet).


Aquarius:
(January 20 - February 18)
Aquarians are the great humanitarians, so the more they can incorporate
planet-saving policies into their driving practices, the happier they
are. That's why you'll see your Aquarius neighbor down the street
collecting used vegetable oil from restaurants and turning it into
bio-diesel for the '68 pickup they rescued from the salvage yard. The
city-dwelling Aquarians with no access to a big garage for science
projects will rely on a hybrid or purely electrical vehicle for
transport. You'll see them using the carpool lane and at rallies and
demonstrations promoting development of solar powered cars and
alternative-fueled or hybrid vehicles, like the Toyota Prius.


Pisces:
(February 19 - March 20)
These folks are in a dream world for most of their waking hours,
including the time they spend on the road. They are more apt to be
gazing at the distant scenery or up at clouds than at the cars in front
of them. Such space cadet Fishes are better suited in a boat than in a
car. Look for them behind the wheel of cars that seem like boats on the
road - a large Grand Marquis or Crown Victoria. These people are also
the ones who pilot the novelty amphibious boats that take people on land
and water tours. Other than that, you might catch them driving an aptly
named Infiniti, for Pisces are the ones most closely connected with the
universal flow of life.

Fordracing200

I dont like that one bit, i am june 21. I have to have my car clean, empty (minus the blondes ) and neat

cntchds

um yeah, not workin for me... i dont see me driving me a taurus... ever

cntchds

o and no benz either... les its the clk dtm, or slr... but no royce

Hotrod

Mine doesnt apply to me. It talks about being an enviromental converationist and boy and I far from it. I say "take them cats off that car, you dont need then."