cntchds

So today I got the news that a kid from my school commited suicide. Obviously concluding from the title, I didn't take it too well. The kid was a good guy, and like most suicides, I'm sure, there were no real signs leading up to it that any of us could see. The kid sat next to me in three classes freshman year (two years ago) and at that time I assumed he was one of the happiest kids on campus.

Well, Monday, his parents were out of the country, and he took his own life.
I don't know how, or why. I don't want to know how, I wish I knew the why beforehand.

Anyway, I was driving, and honestly I broke down in tears. I pulled off to the side and cried until the tears stopped and I had control of myself. On my way home I stopped by my old church to talk to one of the priests there who is a really good friend of mine (please, no references to child molestation, I've heard that once too many times during the telling of this story to find it even remotely funny). When I got there I asked the Parish Office where I could find him, and they told me he was doing a funeral right then, so I walk into the church and sit/cry through the entire ceremony in the babies' room(where most mothers bring their children as to not interupt the services). It wasn't the kid's funeral, just someone's.

So the funeral ends and I go and talk to the priest. He is very understanding of my predicament and told me about how in Ireland things like that are very prevalent and so on. After I get through all of that (about an hour later) he tells me that he has to go to the funeral's reception, so I head off. He told me as I was walking away "go get yourself some ice cream or something, next week I will treat you to dinner so we can talk some more." I agreed and walked to my truck.

I drive a nice long while, ending up at my favorite ice cream parlor. Sit down, eat, leave. About two blocks later is when the car accident actually comes into play.

So there is this big huge Dodge truck, who is driving 25 under the posted speed limit, 15 in a 40. Everyone is weaving around him, and I am behind him approaching at about 20. I slow down to 15 so I'm matching his speed as I look to my left to see if anyone was there so I could change lane. By the time I look back he is at a dead stop about five car lengths from the line of the intersection (the light was green and had been for a while) and about 1/4 of a car length away from me.

I brake and swerve, but there is no hope. I hit his bumper at probably 8-10 mph. At said point I could see him get off his cell phone, throw it at the windsheild, then get out of his car yelling the F word in all of its different forms and usages.

I'm at this point, in a daze, none of this seems real. I get out and he starts cussing in my face. Tells me to "Get the **** off the road" and to give him my license so he can get information. I do as he asks, because I am too depressed/scared to do otherwise. So he takes my stuff down and I ask him for his pen so I can get his information. He responds with "find your own." I asked "would you mind if I borrowed your phone to call my parents?" To which he responded to with "Yes, I would mind very much."

He, at this point, is still cursing and being a completely ***. I asked him politely to stop swearing since I'm already too stressed about that kid I know dying. He responds to that with something similar to "keep driving like this and you'll have to go to more than one funeral."

We finish completing getting eachothers' information, and leave. His bumper had a dent, mine didn't have even a scratch.

I can understand someone being mad that they were run into, but as Arin has already asked me "Can people really be that ignorant to the fact that they are at fault?"

I know that I'm a teenager, and by default, his word means more than mine does, but I've never driven while talking on the phone. I've never stopped in the middle of the road after going a dangerously slow speed, and yet this ******* is going to raise my insurance rates because he is too proud to take the blame he rightfully deserves, which probably wouldn't affect him at all?

This was, quite possibly the worst day of my life. I don't think I've cried so much before.

Just wanted to kinda ask, is this what it's always like? I've heard stories from friends who have gotten in accidents and everyone gets out and is obviously upset, but all in all tolerable. I thought this guys actions were beyond rude, and that even had I deserved to be called at fault, that the way he acted was intolerable.

Sorry for my rant guys, it's been a long, hard day.

future9er24

Pete,

As I told you before, I'm really sorry to hear about this..

As for what accidents are like, they are definately stressful, painful and upsetting, but this is far worse than anything I've ever come accross. I've rolled backwards into a new acura, ive been there for my parents accidents, and even though (also being 17 at the acura incident) i got yelled at and cursed at and called "that dumb kid that cant drive a stickshift" it was not as bad as what this asswipe has put you through.

Some people are ****s when their our age. Some people aren't. Some people change and get more mature as they age. And, as you witnessed today, some people don't.

Hang in there bro. Lifes a god ****ed ***** some times, but you'll get through this. At least you're not hurt, neither is he, and same for your truck. As hard as it is, focus on the upcoming positives in your life.

Take care buddy, and remember,you were there for me when I needed you, I'm here to return the favor.

Arin

Von Bek

Always, always, call the cops for this kind of thing. I know you were not thinking things through, but just having the police there to buffer the situation would have done you worlds of good. Heck, it might have gone in your favor if it's illegal to talk on a cell while driving where you live. And no, it's not always that bad after an accident. But it's just like everything else, some people are douches and some aren't, your going to meet all kinds.

future9er24

Frank makes a good point, it is illegal to be on the phone while driving in CA now, though you cant get a ticket yet. I think the plan is to be pulling over and giving warnings since the beginning of the new year, and tickets will start happening in a few more months.

BUT, it could still help to bring up the cell phone to both your insurance company, and the authorities if tey get involved.

x21

Well, first off, sorry to hear about the difficult series of events leading up to that point.The best advice I can give you is that life is all about challenges. Without them, there would be no struggle, no purpose. Sure life would be easier without them, no doubt. I cringe to use this as an example, but compare it to a video game- how boring and mundane would it be to play one without any kind of challenge? Sure dealing with such a tragedy is difficult- perhaps maybe he could have used my advice as well. Life cant go your way or my way 100% of the time, but that makes the times it does go our way that much more enjoyable and worth living. You cant change what happened in either case, but you can deal with it- adapt to it. Thats how we build our character, and how we gain our strength. I dont know if any of that makes much sense, but I hope it helps.

TheDarkKnight

I'm really sorry you had a tough day. The person behind the wheel of the truck acted like a jerk, although he was older than you, he acted much less like it. If you take anything from this day, know that you acted maturely in every situation you encountered. Everything from pulling over to the side of the road when in tears, to remaining calm and composed in front of the person you had a minor collision with. When you look back on this, you will always know that you were the better man.

cntchds

It does, and I appreciate everyone's comments.

Thanks guys.

cntchds

I really appreciate your statement, and full heartedly thank you. Sometimes it's hard to remember that when you feel like the one being blamed, but I will try to keep that in mind looking back.

TheDarkKnight

No worries. Just keep your head up.

cntchds

Will do.

ShowGT

I have been there, and I am on your side. I recently buried a friend who was 35, I am 34 and what tears you up is the fact he had cancer and his wife left him. The thing that tore me up was at the funeral after they done the 21 gun salute, his youngest boy who is 4 walked to his grandpa who was a member of the salute and tugged on his pant leg. Ryan wanted Pa Pa to pick him up because Dewayne his daddy had gone to Heaven. I could not help but drop a tear or two after this event and it was like the child planned this event for his daddy.

Glenn

when the guy said (keep driving like this and you'll have to go to more than one funeral.) I see that as a threat on your person. The same as if he threatened to kick your butt. I have seen people arrested for that.
I say deney you ever hit him and say you don't know how he got your info.
Don't call your ins company f him

boduke0220

Pete man i hope you are ok, i dont know how i would cope if one of my friends died. You are deffinatly in my prayers tonight,you and your friend are. a guy at our school got killed 2 years ago on an atv. i had talk to him a few times so i might have some clue of what youur going through. but just remember man, God does everything for a reason.


But as for the Retard in the Truck,I wish i could've kept my temper like you did. me and my cousin had a similiar accident and i punched the guy. But now i know to act mature as you did.

StangPower05

Sorry to hear about your loss. Hang in there and you will pull through.

eliyarbrough

Sorrry about that!! Just take your time on buying that stuff from me!! I hope it gets better for you soon! See ya!!

cntchds

Thanks guys, I appreciate all of your comments. After closer inspection today in the light, my truck did take a bit of damage. So not telling the insurance company is out of the question.

The guy called me today to ask for my insurance information, and gave me similar comments to what he said last night. I talked to my insurance soon after, and they said that if he claims it was all my fault (which he probably will) then we will just both pay for our own cars. They also said if he calls again to tell him to just call my insurance company. They were very nice, and I'm glad that they were on my side. The lady even said when I was describing how he was driving "it sounds like he must have been on his cell phone or something." So at least I know they are on my side.

cntchds

I hear that. After talking to some of his closer friends it sounds like he was getting bullied to the point that he would get home crying. Worse yet, his parents never seemed to care. I'm just filled with that feeling of "if I had known, this wouldn't have happened." Not quite the same as your friend, but thinking that someone would leave because they knew is pretty bothering.

The best to you Brandon. I feel your pain.

Hollywood_North GT

It also sounds as though this individual in the truck was driving in an unsafe manner - way under the speed limit (there IS a thing as driving too slow, and you can be cited for it) and while yapping on his cell phone.

How far back of the truck were you? It's always a good idea to apply the two-second rule when you're following a vehicle...four seconds if the person is driving in any sort of erratic or unusual fashion.

Sorry to hear about your classmate. It's no wonder you were upset. Don't be too hard on yourself...these things, unfortunately, can happen in life. Your reaction is perfectly human.

Glenn

sounds like the guy in the truck needs to punched in the forehead. I don't like rude people and I would have messed with him as much as possible. Hopefully you won't hear from him again. If you do post his phone number here so we can call him lol

cntchds

I was about a car length behind him, which I felt was a safe distance had he continued at the same speed. It feels like a dream, I woke up this morning unsure if it had really happened... This whole thing is so strange.