Random Stuff By Hoss 429*
GT Member
Joined: January 18, 2007
Posts: 95
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From: Tennessee Valley
I am moving water from a shed to the garagemahal (doghouse) - I already have the small water heater I am going to use. I am at least going to put in a utlilty sink, something to wash my cars with, and a toilet.
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legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
good help is hard to get
A " BETTER BUISNESS BEREAU" representative came to my shop recently and told me i was not paying proper wages to my helpers 
.'I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,' demanded the rep.
"Well,' i said , "there's my top mechanic who's been with me for 3 years.
I pay him $500 a week plus commission plus free room and board. He also gets triple time for working on a Sunday
and a case of beer for a Happy Hour every Friday"
my painter has been here for 18 months, and I pay him $400 per week plus commission as well and
he doesn't work on Sundays and I provide paid satellite television for free in his room.
'Then there's the half-wit.
He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.
He makes about $20 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of
whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'
'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
'That would be me,' i said !!!
.'I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,' demanded the rep.
"Well,' i said , "there's my top mechanic who's been with me for 3 years.
I pay him $500 a week plus commission plus free room and board. He also gets triple time for working on a Sunday
and a case of beer for a Happy Hour every Friday"
my painter has been here for 18 months, and I pay him $400 per week plus commission as well and
he doesn't work on Sundays and I provide paid satellite television for free in his room.
'Then there's the half-wit.
He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.
He makes about $20 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of
whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'
'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
'That would be me,' i said !!!
Bullitt Member
Joined: May 25, 2010
Posts: 292
Likes: 0
From: Madison, AL
A " BETTER BUISNESS BEREAU" representative came to my shop recently and told me i was not paying proper wages to my helpers
.'I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,' demanded the rep.
"Well,' i said , "there's my top mechanic who's been with me for 3 years.
I pay him $500 a week plus commission plus free room and board. He also gets triple time for working on a Sunday
and a case of beer for a Happy Hour every Friday"
my painter has been here for 18 months, and I pay him $400 per week plus commission as well and
he doesn't work on Sundays and I provide paid satellite television for free in his room.
'Then there's the half-wit.
He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.
He makes about $20 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of
whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'
'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
'That would be me,' i said !!!
.'I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,' demanded the rep.
"Well,' i said , "there's my top mechanic who's been with me for 3 years.
I pay him $500 a week plus commission plus free room and board. He also gets triple time for working on a Sunday
and a case of beer for a Happy Hour every Friday"
my painter has been here for 18 months, and I pay him $400 per week plus commission as well and
he doesn't work on Sundays and I provide paid satellite television for free in his room.
'Then there's the half-wit.
He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.
He makes about $20 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of
whiskey every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.'
'That's the guy I want to talk to...the half-wit,' says the agent.
'That would be me,' i said !!!
now i know where the gremlin and hornet designers came from .. good thing ford fired them .
.. this one of your pics mike g ?
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legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
Thread Starter
legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
Beer, Fishing, Golf and Sex
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and sex."
A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"
"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.
"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.
"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."
"Will you spend this on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.
"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"
"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.
"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.
"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."
The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."
The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf, and sex."
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legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
that`s one of my favorite cruise laps .. plevna to elora to flintville and vantown then head home .. then i sometimes go lincoln to new hope then corders crossroads to kelso .. never see any law in tenn .. law on every corner in bama .. i love the attention i get when cruising .. that`s what it`s all about .. got to get buisy and get the stang finished before warm weather hits .. if it ever does
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legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
in hazel green recently sherriffs deputies shot a drug suspect dead .. at autopsy he was found to have 337 bullets in his body .. when news men asked the deputies why they shot him 337 times they replied " that`s all the bulletts we had ! "
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legacy Tms Member
Joined: January 27, 2007
Posts: 4,617
Likes: 175
From: alerbamer
some of my cruise route in tenn covers dirt roads .. not too many of those left .. if i had remembered i had the "coverall thread" i would`nt have started this one ..
Cobra Member
Joined: January 23, 2007
Posts: 1,296
Likes: 3
From: Flintville, Tennessee
I was cruisin the backroads one day on a road similar to the one you are on. Bending my neck a little to see what was behind a house, my wife said honey, I kept looking, she said HONEY! I look up and the road just ended! Good thing she was with me or I would have been knocking on the door of said house to see if I could get a tow with a tractor. What do you think of the fine road that your president had built in Flintville from Vanntown to Highway 64? That's stimulas money. It is sure to stimulate the economy of quite a few: its so rough that tires will need replaced more often, the grooves with pull you off the road causing suspension and possibly body damage if you run into anything, and you might have to pay to get towed out of the ditch unless a tractor drives by.
